Mid-Valley Voice

Shower Locations and Themes

Like the wedding itself, a wedding shower can be as casual or as formal as the planners choose.

A homegrown affair. For a more intimate, casual shower, consider holding one at your home. Before you volunteer your house, be certain you have ample room for the guests. Will there be enough seating? Bathrooms? Refrigerator space for the food that will be served? At a shower, you want everyone to be able to enjoy themselves. Close quarters are not enjoyable.

A backyard barbeque. On a warm afternoon or evening, consider having the shower outside, where there is room to mingle. Hang outdoor lights, serve tropical drinks and have someone at the grill. Again, make sure you can accommodate the number of guests you're inviting. Make sure there's enough seating and bathrooms. And have a back-up plan in case of inclement weather.

Afternoon tea. There are many area tearooms that provide a Victorian atmosphere. You can go the whole nine yards and ask guests to dress the part with gloves and hats. Or go for casual elegance. Either way, a happy bride-to-be, tasty tea and crust-less sandwiches add up to a party made in heaven.

Time for wine. One of the St. Louis region's many wineries can provide wine for every taste, wonderful foods and even entertainment (on specified days and times). You may want to consider hiring transportation for guests, so there's a designated driver before you start. A winery shower can be particularly festive during the strawberry festival or Octoberfest.

Evening cocktails. An evening affair at a fashionable restaurant or bar could be an elegant alternative for a shower.

Sporting news. If the bride and groom are big sports fans, consider renting a suite at Busch Stadium, the Edward Jones Dome or Savvis Center to watch a Cardinals, Rams or Blues game. Offer hot dogs, popcorn, beer and soda. Don't forget to check security restrictions on packages.

A bunch for brunch. Consider having a Sunday brunch either at a restaurant or at home.

Honeymoon preview. Does the couple know where they're honeymooning? If they're heading for Cancun, have the shower at a Mexican restaurant. Bound for Hawaii? Have a luau. Exploring the Eternal City of Rome? Head to the Hill for an Italian feast.

Spa day. Gather the girls for a day of pampering. Some spas have packages available that include a variety of services, from manicures and pedicures to facials and massages. The staff should provide a private room where you can do the gift exchange and serve a healthy, spa-worthy meal.

Your Reception Hall

Selecting Your Reception Site: Your wedding ceremony is just the beginning of the festivities. The celebration continues at your reception. Your wedding reception may be the most important - and largest - party you will ever throw. And a great party deserves a great venue.

There are many factors to take into consideration when selecting your reception site, including:

The number of guests. A large guest list requires a large venue, such as a reception hall or hotel ballroom. Some halls can accommodate up to 900 guests and more. If you have a small guest list, you will be able to have your reception in a more intimate setting, such as a museum, botanical garden or historic home.

Ambiance and atmosphere. Do you want a formal hall with separate areas for drinks, dining and dancing? Perhaps your site would look beautiful by candlelight. Maybe you want something a little more rustic? Do you want to feel fresh air on your face?

Whether you're looking for roomy and airy, or close and cozy, try to view the venues you're considering after the facility's staff sets up for a wedding or while a reception is in progress. That way, you'll be able to judge what the room looks like with decorations and people, and tell whether it's the right atmosphere for you.

Surroundings. Do you see your reception surrounded by green trees? Or perhaps a view of the city's skyline? Maybe you want to be surrounded by colorful blooms or a country field.

When you look at a reception venue, consider not only the interior but also the exterior. Look out the windows and make sure you're happy with what you see.

Facility services. Some reception sites can provide you with a number of services that may make your planning easier, including an on-site wedding coordinator, catering and wait staff, bakers, and valets. If a site does not provide these services the staff should be able to provide you with a list of recommended providers with whom they've worked before or with whom they have special pricing arrangements.

Many brides say that finding a reception site is much like shopping for your dress - not only can you imagine it clearly when you close your eyes, but you'll know the right one when you see it. And with so many venues available throughout the St. Louis area, you can be sure to find one that fits!

Dining Styles The type of wedding you have chosen - casual or formal, traditional or contemporary - should determine the dining style you choose for your reception dinner. Somewhere within these choices will be a dining style that suits you as a couple, your guests and your celebration.

Sit-Down Reception For a formal affair with an elegant tone, a sit-down reception is the ideal choice. Guests generally mingle during a cocktail hour and are called to dinner by meal chimes. Waiters then serve them their courses at their tables. A sit-down reception often times seems to flow quite easily since the guests all can be served at one time.

Buffet Reception A buffet reception is the right choice if your wedding is more casual and you'd like to serve a variety of foods. With multiple choices of entrees and side dishes, all your guests are sure to find something they will enjoy.

However, if you have a large number of guests some guests may be finished with their meal while others are still waiting to get their food. Other guests may be forced to carry their food through an obstacle course of other guests, tables and chairs to get back to their seats.

For a larger reception, you may want to consider setting up two buffets - one at either end of the room. And make sure that you and your groom are served at a head table by the wait staff. There will be many photos taken and you won't want to risk a spill while walking the buffet line.

Food Station Reception If your wedding is more modern, consider food stations. Small buffets can be set up around the room, each featuring a different type of food or theme.

For instance, one station can offer Chinese food, with won tons, crab rangoon, stir fries and fortune cookies. Another can serve sushi and spring rolls. And yet another can offer an assortment of fruits, nuts and cheeses.

Not only will you be able to serve a large variety of foods, but also food stations encourage your guests to mingle. However, with guests up and about, it may be difficult to get their attention for traditional wedding moments, such as the cutting of the cake, first dance and bouquet toss.

And much like the buffet setting, make sure that you and your groom are served at a head table by the wait staff. You don't want to risk a spill on your gown while you or someone else is walking with food.

Seating Arrangements at the Reception At your reception, there are specific places of honor so that the people who are close to you can be seated nearby.

The Bridal Party's Table Traditionally, the bridal party's table is rectangular with seating on just one side, so the guests can have a good view of the couple. Sometimes, this head table is on a raised platform. The bride and groom sit in the center, with the best man on the right next to the bride and the maid/matron of honor on the left next to the groom. The other members of the bridal party are seated on either side, with men and women alternating.

Some couples find that the traditional seating arrangement makes them feel as though they are on display. As an alternative, the bridal party can be seated at a round table utilizing the same seating order as a rectangular table.

Parents' Tables Since a child's wedding is a special day for moms and dads, both sets of parents should have their own table with guests, including grandparents, aunts and uncles. Traditionally, the officiant, and his or her spouse (if applicable), are seated with the bride's parents.

Guest Tables When arranging seating for your guests, you can either group people together who already know one another, or seat guests together whom you believe have similar interests.

A seating chart and place cards can help the dinner seating run smoothly. Write guests' names and table numbers on both sides of the card, to facilitate table conversation, then place the cards in alphabetical order on a table near the reception entrance.

Order of Events at the Reception There are many important, traditional activities that take place during the reception. To ensure that you will have time to enjoy each of these events without having to rush, it's a good idea to determine a schedule of events in advance and provide copies to all vendors, including caterer, photographer and DJ.

6:30 p.m. - Cocktails and Hors D'oeuvres When your guests arrive, they will mingle while enjoying cocktails and appetizers. The DJ or band will play music to start off the party on the right note. Generally, the guests will still be mingling when the bride and groom arrive.

You may choose to have your arrival announced so that guests enjoy your entrance. You may be asked to cut the cake upon your arrival so the catering staff can begin preparing the slices.

Make sure your photographer knows the time the cake cutting will take place so he or she can capture the moment.

7:30 p.m. - Dinner When the dinner chimes ring, your guests will pick up their place cards and find their tables. Then the members of the bridal party will be announced and seated.

Before dinner is served, champagne should be poured at each guest's place in preparation for the toasts. Often, the father of the bride will offer words of welcome, followed by the toasts of first the best man, then the maid or matron of honor. You may want either your officiant or another individual to offer a blessing over the food. Finally, dinner is served.

8:45 p.m. - Traditional Dances After the dinner plates are cleared, the bride and groom take center stage for their first dance as a married couple. This is followed by the father/daughter dance, then the mother/son dance.

Then the bridal party enjoys a dance, pairing the bridesmaids and groomsmen who walked up the aisle together.

9 p.m. - Dessert Is Served After the traditional dances are complete, the catering staff serves slices of cake and/or another desert to your guests. The bride and groom should take time to enjoy the cake - not squishing cake into each other's face.

9:05 p.m. - Tossing the Bouquet For the bouquet toss the single women assemble on the dance floor. When the bride tosses her bouquet, the one who catches it is said to be the next to marry. Do have a special bouquet made for tossing if you would like to preserve your actual bouquet.

Some couples may choose to also have a garter toss, where the groom tosses the garter to the single men. You may want the photographer to stage a picture showing the holders of the bouquet and garter.

9:15 p.m. - Dancing the Night Away Consider starting the evening's dancing with an upbeat song all your guests can enjoy.

10:45 p.m. - Bon Voyage! The newlyweds leave the reception and prepare for traveling. Guests assemble to wish them farewell and the party winds down. Lights that were dimmed when the dancing began come up so guests know to gather their belongings and prepare to depart.